Let’s see how quickly I can sum up my current situation. I have one more day until my residence card expires and still nothing arrived in today’s post. I applied almost a year ago for settled status and was just recently told to please continue to wait patiently as my type of application is complicated. Also, I’ve had to extend my maternity leave, which means not getting paid for three months, and I have no idea if I’ll even have a job to go back to at the end of it … if I’m allowed to be here and work after tomorrow obviously.
Meanwhile, our daughter is almost eleven months old and hasn’t met one member of my side of the family yet. We’ve bought tickets to go to the states for her birthday but we have no idea if we’ll actually be able to use them or if we’re going to have to change them. As a US citizen, I can go and I should be able to bring her with me even though we still can’t report her birth to the US embassy and get her US passport. However, my other half’s chances of being allowed into the country don’t look great at the moment. That would mean Daddy missing her first birthday which just isn’t going to happen even if I thought I would want to go all that way with her and tons of stuff on my own (I don’t by the way).
It is a hard decision to make though. I would really like my grandparents to meet her and there is no way that they can come to us. Also, my sister just had a baby last week and I would really like to meet him. It’s possible for everyone else to hop on a plane and come see us though, as the UK is now allowing fully vaccinated people from the USA to come here without having to quarantine.
Of course that assumes everyone is vaccinated, which is another issue entirely. Is it wrong for me to not be excited about unvaccinated people, including family members, holding/being around my baby after being so careful for so long? Especially when they are choosing not to be vaccinated?
On a completely different note, I’ve failed miserably at my Classics Club Challenge and I’m going to extend my finish date by another five years … oops! I think I’m going to edit my list while I’m at it. There are some books I thought I had included which don’t seem to be there and then there are others on there that I don’t think I will ever actually read.
Ok, time for some happy news. I am now the proud mommy of a little crawler. She had been so close for so long and had long before mastered going backwards and in circles. She is absolutely amazing and if it weren’t for the money situation I would be perfectly content with my maternity leave extension. If anything, I just want time to slow down a bit.
For months I have been meaning to start doing yoga again. I have been doing a lot of walking (with the baby in her stroller) but that has been the extent of regular exercise for me since she was born. I finally committed to Yoga with Adriene’s August calendar and I’m going strong on day 6. I didn’t realise how much I needed to do something for myself, even if it’s for as little as 20 minutes a day. If I’m being honest, I was starting to feel a bit low but this has already made a big difference.
So there it is. I’m trying to keep my hopes up and I’m crossing all my fingers and toes that everything works out in the end. At the same time I’m just trying to enjoy this time I am so lucky to have with my daughter. I’m glad I tend to be a bit more relaxed and laid back because it would be so easy to get completely overwhelmed by everything. Of course I have my moments of doubting myself, worrying I should be doing more and being anxious about things I can’t control … who wouldn’t? I think the key to me staying balanced and happy is being able to see the good things as well and not just focusing on all those not so good things.
Musings of a Little Lizard 